Author: Beata-Alfoldi

The word “transformation” first became popular during the 1960s and 1970s as a new era of spirituality began to emerge. For ‘new-age seekers’ it was a word associated with spiritual awakening, though its deeper meaning remained largely unexplored for quite some time. However, in the 80s and 90s, the word took the corporate world by storm as a trendy synonym for change and by the start of the new millennium it had become so mainstream and common that it was used by many government agencies. The spiritual significance of the word had become completely obscured and I now see why having walked my own spiritual path on this particular topic.

Having the courage to walk a true spiritual path transforms the very nature of our being and by walking this path we become an entirely different person from the one in which we had identified with before; undergoing a metamorphosis, which by its very own nature is often painful. The journey of transformation in this context is light years away from the popular notion that we often read about in most of the spiritual and new age material on this topic today. It is not a glorified ‘bells and whistles’ affair where you will experience instant enlightenment and then your life changes forever. It is real, raw, painful and wild in its sweeping away of your foundations, beliefs and perceptions of reality, and it is a slow process that takes years of self-reflection and deep inner work.

Often this type of deep spiritual transformation and awakening begins with an event or personal experience that shakes your foundations to the core and turns your world upside down and until that moment of awakening, which is often experienced with an ‘opening of the heart’ and consequent sensing of the oneness of all life; the human soul is imprisoned by the matrix of material forces in which it dwells.

On the path of transformation, these material forces are transmuted into spiritual energies and gifts such as wisdom, love, compassion and a higher purpose in life. Technically speaking, the process of transformation occurs in three stages. The terms used to describe these stages of development are:  transmutation, transformation, and transfiguration. Lifetimes are required to complete the metamorphosis that culminates at the stage of transfiguration, which is when the divine light of the Soul pours down upon the outer persona and changes it ~ permanently.

Ultimately, through such a transformation the individual comes to recognize the divinity in ALL. Divine qualities seeded in every soul at the start of our evolutionary journey begin to manifest in the life of the individual. Beauty, truth, wisdom, grace, love and compassion ~ largely hidden until now behind the mask of the persona, are increasingly revealed. The ‘downpouring’ energies of ones Higher Self transform the individual into an instrument for divine expression. The individual is becoming a soul-infused personality, directed from within by the spiritual self.

My own ‘Journey to Soul’ through spiritual transformation really began about two years ago at a time when I thought I had lost everything in my life. When I say everything, I really mean it: my son, my husband, my finances and my home. What I didn’t realize at the time was that I had also found everything in the process.

What I have come to learn is that we must face all of the darkness, grief and pain if we are to truly transform and be able to rename any powerful experience in our lives and claim the gifts of such an experience.

My life is completely different in every sense of the word from two years ago and I am no longer the same person after such a deep journey. However, I am much ‘richer’ in every sense of the word and have found my true spiritual vocation and calling. I now experience a deeper sense of connection, love, compassion and joy in a way that I hadn’t before. I know the impermanence of absolutely everything in this life and in that knowing I have liberated myself from fear.

This is a powerful place for me to be in at this point in my life and in many ways I have come HOME to a place of FREEDOM that is not governed by any external factors in my life; this is our natural state of Being, we have just forgotten it along the way. This conditioned fear has been perpetuated time and time again through society, education, unconscious parenting and media.

It is time for all of us to stop playing so safe and small in our lives and make a difference in the world. It is time for all of us to find the courage to take the path of spiritual and personal transformation ~ that ‘Journey to Soul’.
I promise you ~ it’s worth it!

The word ‘liminal’ comes from the Latin word limens, meaning literally, THRESHOLD ~ the place of transition, waiting, and not knowing.

In ancient times one of the most famous guardians of the THRESHOLD space was the Greek Sphinx and there was good reason for this. The Sphinx is said to have guarded the entrance to the Greek city of Thebes, and to have asked a riddle of travellers to allow them passage. Only those who had the tools, mindset, wit and courage could proceed.

And perhaps it is with this understanding, respect and awareness that we should navigate any threshold space we find ourselves in. Knowing that in the liminal space there is pure potentiality if we trust in the process and navigate with wisdom, patience, trust and care.

I am writing about this because I am THERE, in the threshold between one way of being and the next. Between one life and another. Having gone through an enormous process over the last four years of profound loss in my life, I have finally come through to the ‘other side’ and am looking over the horizon to see what is ‘out there’ and where I really want to BE in the world!

The old stories have been lived, healed, claimed and told and slowly a new myth is arising within ~ a myth of abundance, deep love, contribution, self-actualization, connection, community and compassion.

These thresholds of not knowing our “next step” are everywhere in life and they are inevitable. Each ushers in a new chapter or a new book! Whether it is a graduation, a new career, new cities, new countries, a marriage, a divorce, sickness, different life stages, changing friendships, births, deaths ~ all will disorient us for a while, regardless of how aware we are during the transition.

Most of us in the middle of a liminal space ask ‘NOW WHAT?”

Really, there are far better questions than “now what?” It carries with it the dangerous assumption that there is one clear answer, and it should have presented itself by now.

RARELY is this true or that simple.

And the main reason why there could never be just one clear answer to the “now what” questions? Because change never existed in a box, no matter how hard we might try to contain it. Change in one area of life always ripples into others disrupting the status quo there, because everything is interconnected.

When we believe that there is one clear answer or direction we often miss the real potential for our formation in the THRESHOLD spaces.

And when we become aware of our own liminality, most of us, if we’re honest, don’t know who to be or how to navigate it. And yet, we have developed ways of moving through transitions ~ patterns and behaviors which have either been regenerative or degenerative to our growth and to the formation of our future.

Regardless of the type of change, only we have a say in how we will ultimately transition. Those who move best through a transformative liminal space always have a deep trust and awareness that it is a transitional space and therefore it requires patience, nurturing and an allowing of the new space to reveal itself.

It really makes all the difference in having the right people around you to help you see what you can’t see, challenge preconceived assumptions and discover new truths, encourage, care and assist in any way possible to help get you through a THRESHOLD.

Being a shamanic practitioner and healer, one way in which I like to honor these transitions is through ceremony. Ceremonies and rituals are the ultimate LIMINAL SPACES.

Liminality is the space of TRANSITION that occurs in the middle stages of a ceremony, when participants no longer hold their pre-ceremony status but have not yet begun the transition to the status they will hold when the ceremony is complete.

In the middle of a ceremony at the liminal space, participants “stand at the threshold” between their previous life and the one yet to emerge.

So, here I am, trusting in the threshold.

Having moved through one state of being and finding myself not quite at the next.

One thing is for certain, I shall BE with this process and allow the next step to REVEAL itself to me ~ for just as the sun always rises to greet us, so will our path of destiny.

I’m in the process of going through some pretty big changes in my life right now; changes that are requiring me to move out of the comfort zone, step up and into deeper spaces of trust within myself and within my life.

These changes include leaving a yoga job that I’ve had for over 9 years and other work commitments that have supplemented my income whilst growing and developing my own business for the past two years.

I’ve been incredibly grateful for these jobs that brought in new experiences, deep connections and cash flow in amongst me pursuing my passion and life-purpose.

However, this year it feels right to let go and to trust in the process of my life, in all areas.

Change comes in many ways and in many forms in our lives.

In fact, we all know that the only ‘constant’ in life IS change.

It might come in the form of a devastating tragedy, a broken relationship, loss of a job, an illness, or death of a loved one. It can also be an exciting opportunity, change of residence, a new love relationship, a birth, or any other beautiful and inspiring life event.

What I have discovered in my life is that even though change can be challenging ~ change has often been for the best. It forces us out of our comfort zones into a space of surrender, trust, inspiration, humility and grace.

Accomplishing anything great in life usually requires significant change and the courage to follow through with that change, whatever that might mean.

Of course, dealing with seemingly negative and unexpected changes in our lives is often challenging, scary and painful. But so is staying in a relationship, job, or a life situation that no longer inspires or fulfills you.

Whatever change you’re dealing with, know that how you navigate that space of change will have an impact on your life and the lives of those around you, forever.

So often we found out who we really are in times of greatest adversity, upheaval and change.

These moments in our lives not so much shape us, but show us more of who we truly are!

And so, with a splash of fear, but also with deep knowing and a courageous heart ~ I feel ready to fully step into my life, to claim who I am and what I am here to do.

Are you?

According to the World Health Organisation; every year worldwide, 2.64 million babies are stillborn, with Africa having the highest rate of infant mortality. In Australia that statistic is 2,000 babies every year, 6 babies every day and 1 baby in every 134.

These statistics didn’t mean very much to me until my son became one of them.

In 2011 my son Alakai passed away in the process of a three–day labour when he was full term. At a time when most parents are expecting to bring home their new bundle of joy and start a new family and life together, my husband Tom and I were left with the shock, emptiness, grief and unthinkable loss of our first child.

What this experience propelled both of us into was our own very real and deeply personal ‘dark night of the soul’; where all of our core beliefs, ideologies, plans for the future and indeed our relationship was put to the test. Our relationship as husband and wife didn’t survive (a common statistic apparently as a result of such a loss), but what I came away with was a way to navigate a new path of heart, purpose and soul.

These points of crises in our lives carry within them a seed ~ the potential for deep transformation. What I have come to realise is that when we have the courage to move away from ‘the story’ of any situation that we experience in our lives, we can (if we choose) come to see the perfection and beauty of ALL THAT IS.

And how do we finish with ‘the story’ ~ by going deeper into the pain, until there is nowhere else to go or hide. The person who is free of suffering has gone to the depths of the abyss and returned with the gifts that the suffering was intentioned to awaken in the first place.

In these moments of great initiation we are given the opportunity to truly become free; to embrace a greater version of ourselves that is not governed by how society, the medical system, the media, friends and family would expect us to behave, feel or be after any such journey of deep loss and grief.

My experience is that when we are faced with times of deep pain, crisis and hardship in our lives; our own daily spiritual practice, trust in Spirit’s infinite wisdom and love, as well as our own path of choice, must be embraced in order to truly heal and reclaim those parts of ourselves that have shattered.

I have come to be in a great space at this time in my life. I am continuing to explore, embrace and step into all that I am, all that I share and all that I choose to be and experience in every moment.

I will always feel a deep sense of love, honour and respect for the enormous journey that Tom, Alakai and myself chose to gift, traverse and experience with each other.

I have spent a lot of time healing and integrating my experience around the birth and death of my son Alakai and parts of what I have expressed may be challenging for some of you to hear.

However, the greatest gift you can give anyone is the freedom to allow that person to be and experience their own journey. You can never fully understand someone else’s journey until you have walked in that persons shoes and even then, it would still be subjective.

The greatest gift of my life thus far, has been my son Alakai ~ the depth of his loss awoke in me a joy and beauty that reconnected me to the sacredness of all life. It allowed me to BE with Spirit in a way that I could never have imagined possible, in a way that inspires me each and every day.

In a world that generally does not embrace death as a natural part of life, we have forgotten how to live as a society. Perhaps it is time for each of us to remember that this life of ours is more precious than any of us know, and that the moment is all we have and in every moment we are free.